by guest author Dave Flook
Sometimes the consequences of our actions are not apparent until it’s too late.
Several months ago I was approached by a girl in her mid-teens. She mentioned that she had seen an article for Not All Dads Are Deadbeats in the local newspaper and that she recognized me from my picture. She went on to tell me her heartbreaking story and experiences living in a tumultuous post-divorce environment.
“The result of a bitter two year court ordeal was that I only got the see my dad twice a month. He eventually lost his factory job and couldn’t afford the court costs. He left three years ago and I haven’t seen him since.”
She goes on to say,”…I wish he fought for me like you are fighting for your little girl. I wish my mother never did that to him. I wish I grew up knowing both my parents the way a child should.”
I’ve met thousands of parents and grandparents over the past 5 years of running my equal parenting organization and have felt the pain of every single one of them. It is only after listening to our children that we get a good dose of the stark realities of our actions.
Parental alienation leads to an increase in teen runaways, suicides, depression, drug abuse, alcohol dependency (sourced from StatsCan and psychological studies).
Our children need us to be proper adults – loving, nurturing, respectful. They need their Grandparents, aunts, uncles, friends etc. from both sides of the family. Our children simply need US.
My organization is comprised of men, women and grandparents who all have been systematically reduced to being a visitor in their kids and grandkids lives.
The decisions we make today can have great consequences years from now. Those outcomes can be productive and positive or they can be destructive and negative. For the sake of our children we much adhere to the former rather than the latter.
Wage peace with your partner as best you can. Our children will thank us for it.
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Dave Flook is the founder of North America’s Leading Equal Parenting Organization Not All Dads Are Deadbeats. His goal is to promote our children’s rights to maintain significant and meaningful relationships with both parents after relationship breakdown. NADADs offers unique free support resources for everyone affected by the family court system.
