by guest author Aimee Lyons
Moving can be a tough process for anyone, but when you’re going through a divorce, it can be even more emotional. For most people, separating comes with a lot of memories — some sweet, some awful — and packing up the home you shared with your ex can be extremely painful. It’s important to remember to take your time if possible and to be gentle with yourself.
Here are some tips for making a smooth transition during such a difficult time.
Make sure your legal affairs are in order.
Learn about your legal rights and, if possible, work with a family mediator and/or an attorney to make sure everything about who gets what is settled before you begin the process of moving.
Plan ahead.
If you and your former partner still need to divide up belongings, be careful to keep their things separate by marking them with Post-It notes. Make a plan for movers, storage units, and utility companies ahead of time so there are no surprises waiting on the day of the move. Make sure to grab a forwarding address form from the post office so your mail will be sent to your new place without a hitch.
Don’t do it alone.
Enlisting the help of a trusted friend or family member can go a long way in getting things ready for the move.
If you need to sell your home,
do everything you can to get the best possible price. From what real estate agent to hire to how to stage the house, there is a lot to consider, so be sure to consult with friends or family familiar with the process before you start opening your doors to potential buyers.
Stay organized while packing.
Gather up school and medical records, info on your house, insurance paperwork, current bills, and any other important documents and put them in a clear resealable plastic bag for safekeeping during the move. You might put them in a suitcase along with other items you’ll need that you won’t want to pack, including your cell phone charger, medications, toiletries, and a day’s worth of clothing for everyone. In another bag or box, pack cleaning supplies, a manual can-opener, toilet paper, trash bags, light bulbs, tools, dish soap and a rag or sponge, paper towels, and disposable plates and utensils. This will ensure that if you don’t get everything unpacked in a day–and most people don’t–you’ll at least have a way to eat and clean up.
Keep costs down.
Boxes and packing materials can be expensive, so if you’re trying to save money, visit local supermarkets and retail stores and ask if they have any extra good-sized boxes you can have. They may even have other materials such as packing peanuts as well.
Make it easy.
For clothing, leave anything in your closet on hangers. Make a bundle of several items, secure with a bread tie, then poke a hole in the middle of the bottom of a trash bag or large plastic shopping bag and slide the clothes inside with the top of the hanger through the hole. These make excellent makeshift garment bags, and you can just grab the entire bundle and transfer it to your new closet, untie it, and strip off the plastic.
Label your boxes.
After you’ve decided what can go and what can stay, it can be extremely helpful to mark every box with the room it goes in, and keep a master list of everything you’re taking with you so you can check it when you get to your new home. Or, number each box and write down the contents on a list under that number.
Plan carefully for Moving Day.
Keep an open line of communication with any friends or family members who will be helping out and make sure everyone is on the same page as far as when to meet up. If you’re lucky enough to have more than a couple of helpers, assign someone to go in after each room has been cleared of furniture and boxes to clean and double-check drawers and cabinets.
If possible, bring in furniture and large items first and put them where they’ll be for the foreseeable future rather than loading items haphazardly and sitting them anywhere. If you get the big stuff out of the way, you won’t have to worry about your energy level throughout the day and you won’t be tripping over boxes trying to arrange things.
Make your new home your own.
Filling it with things you love that are outside your previous relationship will help you find comfort and the ability to move on.
