Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness
Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness are the founding principles of the United States, liberal Western democracies, and many of the world’s democracies founded since our Constitution. These principles reward the freedom, spirit, and independence of the individual. At their core is a fundamental respect for the individual’s right to self-determination.
Underlying the principle of self-determination is the belief that the individual is best suited to make fundamental decisions concerning their own life. Each person has the best understanding of their own interests, needs, and priorities.
Government entities, including the court systems, are not the best decision makers for matters concerning one’s family, workplace disputes, or business conflicts. The individuals involved, such as family members, co-workers, and business partners, are best positioned to make such decisions since they hold the relevant information, values, and interests in maintaining ongoing relationships.
Governmental entities are rarely interested in more than resolving the immediate matters at hand and have little concern for the future direction of those relationships. By their nature, governmental decisions prioritize predictability and efficiency, which requires standardized procedures and outcomes. In short, that standardization often comes at the cost of self-determination and individual freedom.
The Role of Government and the Courts
To the credit of governmental and court decisions, they tend to be predictable and uniform, relieving individuals of the responsibility of making important personal decisions. There are certainly those in our communities who prefer others to make decisions for them, are unable to do so, or come from cultures that are hostile to or unfamiliar with the concept of self-determination.
Governmental entities and courts have a legitimate role in providing decision-making services for those who prefer or require that structure. In our multicultural society, we often encounter people who were raised under repressive political, religious, or societal systems for whom the right to make personal decisions is a foreign or even frightening concept.
Mediation and the Right to Self-Determination
Central to the practice of mediation is a fundamental respect for the individual and their sacred right to self-determination. The parties to any dispute possess the most relevant information and understand their own priorities better than anyone else.
Courts and agencies are limited by the Rules of Civil Procedure, statutes, and case law in what they can consider when making decisions. As a result, information or factors that are personally important to the parties may not be legally relevant.
In most disputes, parties have both competing and aligned priorities. Mediation provides a process where those priorities can be identified, discussed, and balanced.
The Benefits of Mediation
Mediation offers participants the opportunity to identify and discuss information they consider relevant, resolve misunderstandings, and craft outcomes that align with their individual priorities. Through respect for freedom and self-determination, mediation leads to solutions best suited to those involved.
1. Reduces Stress
Mediation is less adversarial and more collaborative than other dispute resolution methods. It reassures participants that they are in control of the issues that matter most in their lives.
2. Improves Ongoing Relationships
Mediation encourages participants to work together to find mutually agreeable solutions. The process fosters understanding, mutual respect, and provides tools for resolving future conflicts.
3. Avoids Worsening Fractured Relationships
By the time parties enter mediation, relationships are often already strained, whether personal, workplace, or business related. Working collaboratively toward solutions helps stabilize these relationships moving forward.
In contrast, litigation is inherently adversarial. Once it begins, communication between parties often stops, and decisions rest primarily in the hands of attorneys who may not fully appreciate their clients’ core interests and priorities.
4. Cost and Schedule Factors
Mediation is far less costly than litigation and allows participants to control the pace of the process.
In family cases, litigation can easily cost more than a child’s college education, which is something worth considering. I often ask my clients whether they would rather pay for their children’s college education or their attorney’s children’s education. As an attorney, I am not opposed to sending attorneys’ children to college. I just think parents should realize what they are doing.
Call us today or schedule a free consultation and learn more about how our services can help you.
Rick Schapira is a mediator at Colin Family Mediation Group and is an avid writer for The CFMG Blog.
